Select Page

3. It makes us realize that we are aware of our limitations — which we will not do. When we know that our partner knows and respects our limits, we feel safe when it comes to relaxing in the things we look forward to. 6. It creates more intimacy with our partner. If we know what our partner is looking forward to or hesitant to do sexually, we can help him achieve his desires. This type of contract can create a safe and fun playground for couples to negotiate great sex. It must not include the easement and discipline (BDSM) of the Grey contract. Instead, sexual contracts can be what you want to be, opening up a whole world of sexual exploration and discussion between lovers in the process. 1. It can make us aware and titled. Through the process of sexual negotiation, we encourage ourselves to think about what we would consider doing sexually and open up opportunities for sexual exploration.

We are discovering new areas that are turning us on and we can draw attention to our “sexual triggers.” 4. It makes us curious to explore what we could do. If we can say “that kind of interest me, but I am concerned about that… it provides a safe way to participate in activities that we would not normally have thought of. Some might think that this contract is a matter of sex, for others of power, for others of free clothing, and for some people, it smells misogyny. , a new journalism graduate, self-proclaimed Klutz and sexually naïve woman. When you read the novel, you have to ask yourself what your own answers might be. Would I have oral sex or do ice cream? For some, the answers are simple — “absolutely” or “absolutely not!” Other decisions may not be as clear. Just like the sexually naïve Ana, we are fascinated to discover our own answers.

Get your own download contract and complete it with your partner. Ana is aware, however, early on that no legal body would hold this contract in court. In the absence of legal significance, the treaty becomes only a close discussion between man and woman about what they will or will not do in their consensual relationship. I encourage all those who are concerned about gender inequality to read a similar treatise in Sacher-Masoch Venus`s novel furs (the root of the word masochism). This story from 1870 shows that power contracts are not gender-specific. A wealthy baroness acts a similar contract with a potentially servile man or slave. This treaty gives her even more control than Christian Grey dreams of asking Ana to even add a suicide note predetermined by her slave, so that she can completely control her life and even kill him without any legal consequences. In exchange, Christian asks Ana to subscribe for two days. In this context, submission means that Ana is undoubtedly up to all the whims of the Christian.

If she does not obey, he would have the right to “punish” her by any method he chooses. This seems abominable to Ana until she learns that punishment cannot involve “emotional, physical or spiritual damage,” and there are mutually agreed “safe words” that can slow down or stop any activity at any time.